Italian Doctor Prescribes Israel, Palestine High Dose Of Chill Pill

December 6, 2012 by  
Filed under Politics, Uncategorized

ROME––At the request of Pope Benedict XVI, Rome’s foremost family counselor Dr. Umberto Navarro announced today that he has sat down with Israel and Palestine to try to encourage the volitile couple to peacefully work out their issues. “I sat down with the couple for an hour long counseling session and it quickly became apparent that the relationship is not only insecure, but emotionally unstable,” Navarro said. He went on to tell reporters that the couple was, in his professional opinion, “one jacked up couple.” Navarro later issued his assessment of the relationship, recommending separation for the time being as a result of irreconcilable differences.

 Friends of Israel and Palestine say that the dysfunctional couple began dating in 1948, and that they witnessed hostility between the two from the beginning of the relationship. “There were lots of issues, we could all tell,” one friend of the couple reported. “Lots of anger…lots of resentment. It was an arranged marriage, you know? You could just tell they didn’t like each other…didn’t even wanna be next to each other.” Navarro told Eye of the Tiber that there really was not much else he could do, saying, “The relationship, if you wanna call it that, seems to be quite hostile and violent…all I could do is prescribe this disaster of a couple the highest freakin’ dosage of Chill Pill available.”