Man May Have Accidentally Skipped Bead; Begins Decade Over Again

October 13, 2013 by  
Filed under Parish Life


Bridgeport, CT––After having lost himself in a daydream while saying the rosary earlier this morning, 34-year-old Bridgeport resident Luke Spencer awoke unsure of whether his thumb may have accidentally skipped a couple beads while simultaneously saying his rosary and dreaming about Japanese Snow Monkeys bathing in the hot springs of the mountainous region of Nagano, Japan. “At least I know what decade I’m on,” Spencer told EOTT as he tightly gripped the bead he was currently on so as not to lose his place for the fifth time this rosary. “The last thing I remember was meditating on the resurrection, and thinking about Easter Sunday and the Easter bunny. That led me to bunnies, which led me to my childhood when I’d eat Animal Crackers. The rabbits and monkeys were my favorite, so I began to think about monkeys and, in particular, the Japanese Snow Monkeys who keep warm in hot springs.” Spencer went on to say that although it usually takes him approximately 20-minutes to say a rosary, he was now moving on to his second hour and still on his first decade. At press time, Spencer was questioning whether he had said a Hail Mary on the bead he was fingering when this interview began, or whether that was the next bead up.

  • Fran D.

    Obviously, Luke’s mistake was thinking about the Easter bunny. That cuddly little guy then led him down the garden path all the way to the hot springs in Japan. Maybe Luke should stick to the Sorrowful Mysteries?

  • Veronica

    I listen to and follow a recording of the Rosary on my MP3 player. I’ve opened my eyes to hear the ending litany and Sign of the Cross, when I could’ve sworn I was just on the first Mystery. Weird.

  • Gaz

    This guy has to understand that the Angels will finish the decade for you if you get distracted. That’s what the Mystical Body of Christ is all about. Sometimes you need help to get through a decade in less than 10 years. That is why God invented Angels.

  • Laugh out loud funny!!!

  • Jim

    The EWTN Religious Catalog needs to jump on this product idea:

    The Daydreaming Believer Rosary!
    • Easy-grip, no-slip beads made from the same material
    as NFL wide-receiver gloves
    • Battery-powered sensors deliver a mild shock whenever
    the believer lingers on a bead for more than 30 seconds*
    • Optional buzzer feature for chronic daydreamers who
    get lost during the Glory Be and the Fatima Prayer

    *The EAT (ecclesial average time) of a reverent Hail Mary or Our Father in either Latin or any of the contemporary vernaculars worldwide.