Vegan CrossFit Couple Won’t Shut Up About NFP

April 4, 2017 by  
Filed under Parish Life



Friends of vegan and CrossFit enthusiast couple Tim and Samantha Warland expressed frustration this week after the newlywedded couple reportedly “would not shut the heck up” about Natural Family Planning (NFP).

Sources close to the newlyweds tell EOTT that it didn’t take long after the couple returned from an NFP talk for friends to take notice of their new obsession.

“We never really thought it could get worse than Tim and Sam continually talking about how animals are our friends, not food, and jokingly challenging each other to something called ‘burpees’ or something, but it did,” longtime friend Blake Robinson told EOTT. “I’m not saying NFP is bad or anything, of course, it’s just…incessant the way they talk about it. It’s really been amazing to see how they’ve been able to turn every conversation into one about NFP…even when all the people they’re talking about it to are practicing it!”

Robinson concluded saying that, though the Warlands are “annoying as living crap,” that he has a healthy respect for a couple that has the endurance, strength, cardio, and determination to stick with it, even when it gets tough and no one wants to listen to how NFP is not the same as the Rhythm Method.

“Hey, maybe there is something to CrossFit. Any other NFP couple would’ve given up nagging people about it long ago.”