Weird Sedevacantist Group Apparently Still Waiting for Messiah

October 4, 2017 by  
Filed under Libs & Trads

 

Telling those gathered at the annual Confederation of Ultra Traditionalists that they would not recognize the authority of the pope until he acknowledged that the Messiah has not yet arrived, members of SSPBC this afternoon announced new guidelines to help Catholics understand what it means to be in “full communion with the Church.”

“We hope that these guidelines help illustrate that to be in full communion with the Church means to accept that the Messiah has not yet appeared on earth, but that he will because God promised us one,” speaker Bill Corson read from the stage, going on to say that SSPBC would not stop criticizing the “so-called Church” until they changed their Mass back to what it looked like pre-Vatican. “We believe that the See of the Messiah is indeed empty.”

“Our way of life as a church was changed just because some 33ad liberal fanatics thought that they needed to keep up with the ancient times. It’s just sad, because we do want unity with the Vatican, but we’re not going to give in to this modernist idea of Jesus as a savior just because he healed a bunch of people and rose from the dead. David Blaine has also done some pretty amazing things, but you don’t see us worshiping him, do you? No—we need to stand our ground and not stray from tradition no matter the cost.”

  • Priscilla Laliberte

    Lol, “keep up with the ancient times”.

  • samton909

    Call me old fashioned, but I still like the silence and majesty of Abraham sacrificing Isaac. You aren’t really devout unless you are ready to sacrifice your kids, I always say.

    • parishioner ordinaire

      Although I do approve the innovation of allowing the Chief Usher to select which children at church are ready to go next

      • William of Orange

        Well, as a good parent, it demonstrates your willingness to submit to authority. I couldn’t agree more.

  • Lawrence Lam

    Wait…you mean Jews???

    • Professor Q

      Messianic Jews to be precise…

    • Paul Avizinis

      jews is wat youse get when ya squeeze de orange.

  • Professor Q

    What does SSPBC stand for? Sacred Society of Pope “Before Christ”? =)

  • HermitTalker

    Since they chose to go outside the Church, there is no salvation for sede-vacantists, unless by the mercy of Jesus who could excuse their ignorant arrogance. The Catholic equivalent of USA Democrat Trump haters. “Women who voted because their husbands old them to.” Michelle Obama)

  • Monk

    This backward trend could go all the way to denying that God created them male and female!

    • HermitTalker

      Monk The LGBT and other alphabet Soupers are already “trans”-fixed on that point. Keep praying

    • William of Orange

      Gender is a social construct. I feel that right down to core of my being. You know, where my man-uterus is.

  • Paul Avizinis

    I had wondered what had happened to the pharisees thru the ages and …voila…here they are the “Ultra Traditionalists”. I can rest easy now, thanks.

    • HermitTalker

      Except Pharisees were laity. Sede Vs are hierarchs, clerics and lay.

      • Paul Avizinis

        Thanks…still resting easy.. it is a habit of mine.

    • samton909

      I had wondered what had happened to the humorless thru the ages and …voila…here you are

      • Paul Avizinis

        “Let he who is without humor cast the first barb”…thanks for thinking of me.

    • HermitTalker

      So true. Heretics and schismatics are the ultimate Rationalsts who claim to be the most transcendal. Pharisees and Scribes vs Jesus; Prostentants vs Peter and Rome; Sede Vacantists vs the Sancta Sede. We alone

  • Mara319

    All seats are vacant because those guys are standing around, see?