God Kindly Asks Angels And Saints To Stand 6 Feet Apart When Praising and Worshiping Him

April 28, 2020 by  
Filed under Parish Life, Uncategorized

Citing CDC warnings that people stay six feet apart to reduce chances of catching or transmitting Covid-19, sources from the city of God revealed this morning that God Almighty planned to announce stronger measures to help curb the spread of the disease. “I think it’s pretty clear that God is planning to act so as to lessen transmissions,” St. Peter told those gathered near the pearly gates as he provided statistics showing that... Read More

With No Sports Stars To Idolize, Local Christian Temporarily Forced To Worship God

April 20, 2020 by  
Filed under Parish Life, Uncategorized

Guest Writer: Kevin Kukla (ProLife365.com) With no reason to check on any of his fantasy leagues, local sports fanatic Tom Wilhelm reluctantly announced Tuesday morning that he planned to renew a former passion of his–a daily prayer life with God. “He’s now hitting his knees every morning and every night!” reported his wife, Tammy.  “When this COVID-19 lockdown went into place, he emerged from his man cave for the first time in... Read More