Burke Named Head Of Vatican’s Congregation Of Janitorial Services

February 16, 2017 by  
Filed under Vatican

The Vatican announced today that Pope Francis has named Cardinal Raymond Burke to be the first prefect of the Congregation of Janitorial Services. Francis’ decision to choose the staunch conservative to head the new department is a sign to many that Francis does see a role for Burke in his pontificate, despite disagreements the two have had in the past. Several sources in the Vatican say that Francis chose Cardinal Burke because he is known to work well... Read More

Pope Francis Mandates All Catholics Convert To Lutheranism In New Apostolic Exhortation

February 6, 2017 by  
Filed under Vatican

Just hours after Pope Francis published his latest work Reformatio Si, Catholic theologian Cardinal Walter Kasper told reporters that, though Pope Francis’ apostolic exhortation mandating all Catholics convert to Lutheranism might be tough to comprehend, he nevertheless prayed that they have faith in the same Holy Spirit that not only chose Francis to become pope, but also “was the instrument behind the works of St. Martin Luther.” “I... Read More

Vatican To Issue Martin Luther Tramp Stamps

January 19, 2017 by  
Filed under Vatican

According to several reports out today, the Vatican will be issuing lower back tattoos to Catholics in honor of German priest and protestant reformer Martin Luther this October. Although Martin Luther was declared a heretic and excommunicated in 1521, Vatican officials have reportedly sent letters to all Catholics that are “able and willing” to visit Rome for the “official issuing of the ecclesiastical tramp stamp.” “We... Read More

Ringling Bros. Circus And Its Subsidiary The Vatican To Shut Down In May

January 16, 2017 by  
Filed under Vatican

Image:AlejandroLinaresGarcia

Image:AlejandroLinaresGarcia   After  more than 140 years, the curtain is coming down on “The Greatest Show on Earth,” Roman Curia and Ringling Bros. Circus and Barnum & Bailey Circus board member Bishop Antonio Scarlatti said early Monday morning. The iconic Roman spectacle and its principle Ringling Bros. Circus explained that declining attendance combined with high payroll for most members of the clergy in the curia contributed... Read More

Vatican’s Hit Television Show “World’s Next Top Cardinal” Renewed

January 5, 2017 by  
Filed under Vatican

Image: Carolus

Image: Carolus The most successful elevation reality TV series in Catholic television history, World’s Next Top Cardinal, has been renewed. This Spring, Season 3 of WNTC will be strutting down the center aisle runway on VaricanH1 with a new host, panel members, and a batch of brand new ecclesiastical experts. As always, the competition will feature an all-male cast competing for the coveted auriphrygiata. “In 2017, cardinaling is going... Read More

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