Jack Chick Having Heated Debate With Saint Peter At Pearly Gates

Image:Brendan Riley

Image:Brendan Riley Evangelical cartoonist Jack Chick whose tracts spread biblical messages to the pagan world, as well as notified a billion Roman Catholics... Read More


Android Priests Being Developed To Help Say Mass, Hear Confessions

Prototype clergydroid Fr. SRT4-11392 celebrating its first wedding ceremony. Vatican––The Vatican has confirmed reports today that an agreement has been reached with the International Federation of Robotics (IFR) to begin development of... Read More


There Was Certainly A Point During My Clown Mass When I Thought, “What The Hell Am I Doing?”

Tuscan, AZ–Pastor of St. Genesius Catholic Church in Tuscan, Arizona Fr. Edmond Harrington confirmed to reporters this afternoon that at one point during his first Clown Mass, he looked at his oversized checkered shoes and thought... Read More


Homily Never Going To End, Sources Confirm

Galveston, TX–Multiple sources at Prince of Peace Catholic Church in Galveston, Texas have just confirmed that parish pastor Fr. Robert Warner is “never going to wrap up his freaking homily.” 29-year-old mother of three Katrin... Read More


Man Dressed As Tabernacle At Halloween Party Ignored; Is Moved To Corner Of Room

According to reports from several eyewitnesses moments ago, 27-year-old Emmanuel Dickens, who showed up to a Halloween party dressed as his favorite tabernacle, was promptly ignored and escorted to the corner of the room. The party’s... Read More

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Parish Life

St. Joseph Of Cupertino Sick Of Bailing Out Students Who Did Not Study For Test

Speaking to fellow saints in Heaven today, Franciscan saint Joseph of Cupertino announced that he was “simply fed up” with bailing out lazy students who “hardly... Read More

Drive Thru

Drive-Thru Confessions Huge Hit In Local Parish

Wichita, KS––Reports out of The Church of the Most Holy Trinity in Wichita, Kansas are confirming that last week’s launch of their new drive-thru confessional... Read More

Students At Indiana University Even More Scared Now Knowing Dominican Praying On Campus

Just a day after students at Indiana University mistook a Dominican for a member of the Ku Klux Klan, students and members of the faculty have been placed on high... Read More


St. Valentine Makes Impassioned Plea For Safe Return Of Kidnapped Feast Day

In a heart-wrenching moment on the Today Show earlier this morning, 3rd century saint Valentine made an emotional plea to the kidnappers of his feast. Speaking... Read More

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Image: Patnac

Catholic High School Freshman Arrested After Taking Homemade Liturgical Calendar To School

Image: Patnac   Local police chief Ronald Defray announced today that... Read More


Paula Deen Not In Hot Water After Using Anti-Catholic Slur

Savannah, GA––Just weeks after admitting she used racist and anti-Semitic comments... Read More

In memoriam: 
Father Gabriel, Rodrigo Mendoza, Fielding, The Other Jesuit

Four Jesuit Missionaries Dead After Battle With Portuguese Colonists

In memoriam:Father Gabriel, Rodrigo Mendoza, Fielding, The Other Jesuit Iguazu... Read More

Pope Francis Spends First Day In Korea Wondering Whether He’s In The Good Or Bad Korea

Seoul, Good Korea–The pope read a 10-minute speech in English at... Read More

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“Well, That Was A Complete Bust,” Francis Tells Crowd Moments Before Cancelling Remainder Of Year Of Mercy

Image: Wikicommons

Image: Wikicommons During his general audience this week in Saint Peter’s Square,... Read More

Members Of Roman Curia Flood Michael Voris With Invitations To Visit Vatican

Image: WikiCommons

Image: WikiCommons Just days after Catholic internet personality Michael Voris revealed... Read More

Francis Changes Mind; Declares 2016 “Year Of Divine Wrath”

Hundreds of Catholics gathered in St. Peter’s Square this morning to celebrate... Read More

Vatican Picks Up Free Agent Tim Tebow

VATICAN––Last year, after being released by his second NFL team, Tim Tebow sat... Read More

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