First Ever “World Geriatric Day” To Take Place In Boca Raton

August 11, 2013 by  
Filed under Uncategorized, Vatican

Excited Old People

VATICAN––Just a couple weeks after announcing the location of the next World Youth Day, Pope Francis this morning has announced that the location of the first ever World Geriatric Day will take place in Boca Raton, Florida. After returning from what has been called “immense” and “welcoming” crowds in Rio, Francis commented to reporters that “These kids already got the idea. Now if I could only find a way to reach their grandparents, perhaps then I could get a little fun in the process of catechizing.” For many elderly Catholics, this announcement came as welcomed news. 74-year-old Ruth Conway told EOTT that she was looking forward to the event, and was looking forward to making the arduous 5-minute pilgrimage from her home to the location of where many of the activities will take place. “Oh dear, this is wonderful news. Herb, isn’t this wonderful news? Herb? Anyhow, I’ve always seen those kids on the television having such a good old time and wondered what it would be like. The Holy Father would make a such wonderful addition to our canasta circle, don’t you think? Are you hungry, dear? I’m so sorry I didn’t even ask? Look at you…you’re a skeleton. Eat up.” Activities at WGD will include Bible Bingo, ecclesiastical shuffle board and pre-consecrated wine tasting. Naps will be encouraged between all events.