Nominal Catholic Parents Just Going To Kick Back And Let Son’s Religious Ed Teacher Do All The Work

May 4, 2015 by  
Filed under Parish Life

Declaring that they didn’t have the knowledge or will to properly catechize their son, local nominal Catholic parents Bert and Donna Tomlinson told the press today that they were officially leaving their son’s eternal salvation in the hands of his catechism teacher.

“Yes, as a Religious Ed teacher, one of my duties is to make sure that my students learn about the things most parents don’t have time for, like Jesus and salvation.” Anthony Spalding told EOTT as he deposited his $750 paycheck. “Society expects too much from parents these days. I dare say they expect the impossible. How is it possible for parents to do the essential things like making sure their children get enough quality TV and internet time, not to mention video game hour…and then to ask them to teach their children about the Church? No, no…that’s too much. That’s my job…it’s why I get paid the big bucks.”

Spalding added that if the Church continued to stress that parents spend more quality time with their families, that children would suffer and would be left out from learning indispensable life lessons as provided by role models like the Kardashians.