Jack Chick Having Heated Debate With Saint Peter At Pearly Gates

October 25, 2016 by  
Filed under Libs & Trads

Image:Brendan Riley

Image:Brendan Riley

Evangelical cartoonist Jack Chick whose tracts spread biblical messages to the pagan world, as well as notified a billion Roman Catholics that they were all going to suffer eternal damnation, peacefully died Sunday at the age of 92.

According to an anonymous saint within the Pearly Gates, Chick, now three days deceased, is in a heated debate about the existence of Purgatory with Saint Peter.

“Ah, you get one of these guys in here every eternity or so,” said the anonymous saint. “They come in here angry and grumpy and all know-it-all and they just won’t take ‘no’ for an answer. He’s been arguing with Saint Peter for a good two days now, mortal time, and after not getting the answer he wanted about Purgatory, has asked to see Peter’s supervisor so he can ‘tell him a thing or two about everlasting life.'”

The anonymous saint, who may or may not have been an Archangel, went on to say that Chick claimed that [Saint Peter] was not in fact Catholic, but just another Christian “like everyone else,” and that if he was indeed a Catholic, he wasn’t so sure he wanted to enter the so-called pearly gates he was “protectin’ with them keys anyhow.”

“You listen here, I don’t care what you say those keys in your hands represent,” Chick is reported to have said. “I’m not going anywhere until I see your supervisor, is that understood? And, listen, I made a good amount of money in my day, and I can tell you that those them keys you got there in your hand are probably gold-plated, so don’t you go on pontificating at me about all that ‘Thou are Peter and upon this rock’ doodly squat. I didn’t spend all these years tellin’ people they was going to hell just to find out there was a purgatory to save them.”


  • Heinz

    If Peter were christian and not catholic, why would he be standing *outside* the pearly gates? I think that proves it all.

    • I think I understand what you’re saying but I have to reiterate because of the way you said it Catholics are Christian

      • Heinz

        Yeah, I was afraid that the sentence was too terse.
        I failed my chance on that magnificent joke. :~|

  • samton909

    Well, if all Catholics were going to go to hell, and if St Peter was a Catholic, then we have to assume Jack Chick is arguing with St. Peter so that he can be allowed to get into hell. Karma, man.

    • Howard

      It has been said that God watches over children, fools, drunkards, and Americans with a special providence. Jack Chick makes the list.

  • Mariae

    Ahahahah great

  • I can’t help but think that Jack Chick is one confused dude right now. (Not that he wasn’t already.)

    • Stephen Dalton

      Yes, he really is confused right now. He’s having a very hard time understanding why heaven smells like brimstone!

      • Name

        Woooaaaahh….. Never presume that.

        • Stephen Dalton

          Chill out, dude, this is a humor site!

  • Stephen Dalton

    Jack Chick sold books and pamphlets that he knew were filled with lies. I really don’t think he’s arguing with St. Peter right now! No, I think he’s asking Rivera and some of his former authors”What the hell are you doing here!”

    • iamlucky13

      Jimmy Akin had an interesting post on his blog about meeting Jack Chick. He couldn’t decide whether the presumption Chick was lying was accurate, but didn’t seem to think so.

    • Jimmy Wiggins

      Ok, look… here’s the thing. I know that Chick is basically to us what the alt-right is to Jews. I know that Chick spread ridiculous lies about us that a number of gullible people believed him and still do and that if he had any kind of political power he would use to it to inflict massive injustices on Catholics. I get that. But having said that I really question the expressing of the belief that the man is in hell as we speak. The guy obviously had problems. Let’s pray for him instead.

      • Stephen Dalton

        Jack Chick knowingly published stuff that he knew had

        • Jimmy Wiggins

          We are to pray and hope for all souls, especially for people like Chick whom our natural senses lead us to doubt the reality of their salvation. Jack Chick may have had some underlying psychological issues we don’t know about. We don’t know who’s in hell and who’s not.

          • Chrysostomist

            Fr. Schouppe in his book on Purgatory directs us to pray for all souls, too. One of the stories he writes is about a priest that did not give a proper funeral for a prostitute thinking that from her reputation, she surely went to hell. Later, the priest dies and suffers long in purgatory for his treatment of her. The lesson is do not live as though you fully believe someone is in hell, which is what the priest did. (As I write that, I am reminded of The Dogma of Hell, in which Fr. Schouppe presents stories of some priest or saint asking a dead person’s body where she is, and she miraculously responds that she is in hell, a case where someone is known then to be in hell.) These two books are both outstanding reads and basically all stories, if you are like me and find stories easier to read than something that is not a story. You can even read The Dogma of Hell free online. While on Purgatory, I will also take the chance to recommend Fr. Faber’s book on Purgatory and the Purgatorian Manual.
            We do know and are supposed to live like we know that it is very hard to go to heaven, and we also know that a vast majority go to hell (from saints’ quotes and Our Lady of Fatima), while “few” find the gate to life. While it can easily look like Jack Chick is one of the very many to go to hell, we should still pray for his soul, and if he is in hell, the prayers for him are put to another purpose, maybe another soul in Purgatory. All our prayers for a soul after his death, if God wills, maybe be retroactively applied to the person at a moment immediately before death. They would account for a conversion at that time, a most undeserved grace of contrition that so many people are not given and only given by God’s mercy, leading to his avoiding condemnation to hell. When you pray for the souls in Purgatory, remember, you show them mercy in shortening their duration there or relieving their sufferings, and that you are shown mercy when you show mercy. The souls you help in Purgatory will not forget your helping them when it is your time to die and meet God with Satan there accusing you. They will be there, begging for mercy on you for showing mercy to them.

          • Howard

            Private revelation is not de Fide.

        • Robert Dye

          Maybe, and maybe not. Whatever you say about where Jack Chick might be right now, you probably have to say the same thing for Alberto Rivera.

          Thing is, Alberto was buried in my parish boundaries, in North Tulsa. I celebrated a mass kneeling on the man’s grave, praying for God to have mercy upon his soul.

          I would never pray for something I believe to be impossible. I believe in God’s mercy. I hope I can share a cup of coffee with both Alberto and Jack in Heaven one day, and they can fill me in on what was behind it all.

          But that can only happen if God shows them both mercy.

          And me, as well.

          So, I hope.

          I hope you hope, too.

  • Sr. Mary Brigid

    Even during the Year of Mercy, that dog don’t hunt.

  • You know I’m not going to judge Jack Chick’s soul he may have very well thought what he was doing was right. He was only responsible for what he knew and what he knew may have been something that wasn’t true

    • Heinz

      None of us should judge him, as only God knows him completely.
      However based on the idea that he did wrong, his ignorance to the fact will not save him, or will it?
      I understand that in our life we are given warnings and ample time to repent. If we ignore the warnings and die, it might just be “too late”, as for the foolish maidens, who also had no evil intend.
      Mind you, yesterday I had never heard of Jack Chick, so I’m far from having an even mildly informed opinion about him.
      But separate from him I am sure that lifelong ignorance is not a free card from consequences. (At least I will not bet on it for my own life)

  • Paul L

    Nice concept, poor execution.

  • Brendan Quinn

    St Peter doesn’t have the keys, the current Pope has them.