Weird Sedevacantist Group Apparently Still Waiting for Messiah

October 4, 2017 by  
Filed under Libs & Trads

  Telling those gathered at the annual Confederation of Ultra Traditionalists that they would not recognize the authority of the pope until he acknowledged that the Messiah has not yet arrived, members of SSPBC this afternoon announced new guidelines to help Catholics understand what it means to be in “full communion with the Church.” “We hope that these guidelines help illustrate that to be in full communion with the Church means to accept... Read More

Joel Osteen Vigorously Attempting To Shove Camel Through Eye Of Needle

August 29, 2017 by  
Filed under Libs & Trads

Image: RobertMWorsham   [News Brief]   Just days after refusing to offer shelter at his megachurch to victims of Hurricane Harvey, popular pastor Joel Osteen of Lakewood Church in Houston was seen vigorously attempting to shove a camel through the eye of a needle. In a post on Twitter Saturday, Osteen said he was praying for those affected by the storm, and asked Christians to pray for him to gain eternal life. “We all know how difficult it... Read More

Ford Debuts New RAD-TRAD X9 Van

August 16, 2017 by  
Filed under Libs & Trads

  Just in time for back-to-homeschool, Ford’s roll-out of the new RAD-TRAD X9 is a nod toward its largest conversion van market segment: radical traditional Catholics. The 15-passenger van, guaranteed to take up two or more parking spots at parish events, arrives at dealerships next week. Intentionally built to pre-Vatican II safety standards, Ford’s engineers avoided certain modernist frills like seat-belts and air bags.  Nevertheless, reports... Read More

Sophisticated Lefeverist Smuggling Tunnel Found Under Vatican Walls

August 2, 2017 by  
Filed under Libs & Trads

  The largest cross-boarder Lefeverist smuggling tunnel to date was discovered in a midnight raid earlier today by Swiss Guards.  The smugglers fled, abandoning contraband with a street value of over 3 million euros.   Smuggled goods found included pirated copies of “Teach Yourself Latin” software, DVD’s of “The Cardinal,” as well as thousands of copies of Familiaris Consortio and the Decrees of the Council of Trent.... Read More

Forward-Thinking Traditionalist To Allow Wife To Wear Pants

June 26, 2017 by  
Filed under Libs & Trads

  Traditionalist husband Arthur Nash issued his wife of eighteen years, Carla Nash, permission to wear pants “in a manner that is conducive to comfort, but that does not lead to temptation” for the first time in their marriage. Mr. Nash’s decision did come with several stipulations, one of which was that “to insure that no form of my wife’s legs are seen by a stranger, any pair of pants worn must be large enough... Read More

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