Montana Bishop Candidate Allegedly Body Slams Catholic News Agency Reporter

May 25, 2017 by  
Filed under Politics

Bodyslam-Hugo Fernandes

Bodyslam-Hugo Fernandes


Just days after rumors emerged that Montana priest Fr. Gregory Forte could be made a bishop, reports that he apparently attacked a Catholic News Agency reporter the night before the pope made his final decision has thrown the diocese into turmoil.

Political reporter for Catholic News Agency Mary Rezac claimed late Wednesday night that while asking Forte a question regarding how silly altar girls look when they wear high heels, the candidate for bishop suddenly body slammed her to the floor, breaking his glasses and shouting, “Get the hell out of here.”

“He took me to the ground,” Rezac told colleague Ryan Thomas. “This is the strangest thing a priest has ever done to me.”

A spokesman for the diocese released a statement accusing Rezac of crashing the Mass, claiming that Rezac “walked up to the altar, aggressively shoved a recorder in Forte’s face, and began asking badgering question.”

But witnesses say that after Forte asked Rezac to remove the recorder, he then removed parts of his vestments, saying, “I’m sick and tired of this,” and body slammed her, before moving into position to place her leg in what is known as a DDT. It was at that point that Rezac was able to free herself and grab a conveniently placed folded chair.

“That’s when she hit him with the chair,” one witness told EOTT. “Calling to those gathered to get on their feet, Rezac went on to execute a suplex on Forte, which laid him out long enough for authorities to arrive.”

Church officials said Rezac was examined at a hospital and released. Officials have stated though the nature of the injuries did not meet the elements of a mortal sin, that Forte would be booked for misdemeanor wrath.

  • Ed Morrissey

    Many of the parishioners had not yet heard of this incident, but among those who had, a surprising amount of support was expressed for the priest. “Yes, I know that his job is to lead us as shepherds to salvation in Christ’s peace,” one said, “but it’s more important to beat media figures into silence. It’s not as if we think he’ll get violent with us.”

  • Twinkle5

    Conveniently placed folding chair near the alter? Seems extremely suspicious to me. I am perplexed why Mary would not have tried to execute a sleeper hold or a flying drop kick to the nether regions.

  • Pooka

    “Misdemeanor wrath” – I love it!

  • JFarinholt

    In my humble opinion, Ms. Rezac’s response was more masculine than Mr. Jacobs’.

  • Monk


    • samton909

      Sacred Congregation for the Promulgation of the Doctrine of the Rear Naked Choke.

  • kamiller42

    “It’s the Eye of the Tiber. It’s thrill of the fight, rising up to the challenge of its rivals. And the last known survivor stalks his prey in the night. And God’s watchin us all with the EYE… of the Tiber.”

  • Monk
  • Frank Hammond

    why did you decide to go “political” and stop being funny?