Vatican Shuts Down After Liberals, Rad Trads Can’t Come To An Agreement

January 22, 2018 by  
Filed under Politics

Ricardo André Frantz   Hundreds of thousands of priests from around the world have either been sent back to the rectory or have been told to not show up to say Masses today as clerical furloughs took affect midnight due to the Vatican shutdown. Cardinal Robert Sarah delivered an ominous warning to cardinals gathered at the Vatican this morning, saying that “The shutdown is going to get a lot worse tomorrow if the Pope doesn’t act immediately.” Essential... Read More

Recreational Heresy Now Officially Legal in California Parishes

January 2, 2018 by  
Filed under Politics

  Roman Catholic dioceses in California began allowing recreational heresy Monday in what has been seen as a milestone in the mainstreaming of dissent. Lines formed outside churches licensed to allow heresy hours before Mass and CCD times, and RCIA teachers said they had stocked up in expectation of huge demand for new types of heresy. “There’re bigger crowds here than I saw at all the Christmas masses put together this year,”  said pastor... Read More

Knights of Columbus Changes Name to “Knights of Indigenous Peoples”

October 11, 2017 by  
Filed under Politics

  Two months after ditching their ostrich-plume chapeaus, the Knights of Columbus continue their rebranding efforts by announcing the organization shall be henceforth known as the “Knights of Indigenous Peoples.” “This change distances us from that conquistador Columbus,” said Eric Jenkins, Commander of Assembly #4251 and one of nearly two-dozen millennial members nationwide.  “Everyone knows he was a racist.” “We’re not caving into... Read More

Seminary Recruiting Scandal Rocks Diocese

September 28, 2017 by  
Filed under Politics

Image_Chris Watson   The USCCB’s crackdown on seminary recruiting corruption rocked the Archdiocese of Louisville Wednesday after head  of the Vocation Office was fired days after his seminary acknowledged  its part in a federal bribery investigation. According to the USCCB, an unnamed seminarian asked for $50,000 if seminaries wanted to secure his place in their diocese. Catholic media identified the player as Robin Carpenter, whom Supplication... Read More

Parishioners Refuse To Stand During The Our Father

September 25, 2017 by  
Filed under Politics

  [News Brief] Catholics parishioners across the U.S. protested during the Our Father Sunday in defiance of Pope Francis, who said that parishioners who kneel during the “Lord’s Prayer” should be denied communion. Many parishioners sat, kneeled, or stayed inside restrooms during the recitation of the Our Father, with some pastors encouraging parishioners to express themselves. Demonstrations began Sunday when nearly two dozen parishioners of... Read More

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