Catholic Costume Stores Across Country Reveal Most Popular Halloween Costume Is Slutty Mark Shea

October 31, 2017 by  
Filed under Parish Life

 

As time runs out to pick the perfect Halloween costume, costume stores across the country have confirmed that this year’s most popular Catholic costume is a slutty Mark Shea.

Employees of Seattle’s Halloween Express are working overtime to keep the shelves stocked for last minute shoppers.

“It’s been insane this year crazy,” Halloween Express owner Tom Weaver told EOTT. “Slut is in. Everything from slutty Marty Haugen to skanky Lector is in demand. And when we run out, It’s really hard for us to talk people into the more traditional Catholic costumes like saints.”

“Skinny Jimmy Akin has been pretty popular this year too,” Halloween Express associate Candice Michaels said. “But Cardinal Burke dressed In Modern Novus Ordo Vestments have also been a huge hit.”

Michaels also said that popular fallback options like LCWR Nuns Wearing A Habit and Simcha Fisher Wearing A Dress While Preaching That Wearing Pants Is Immoral have both been selling extremely well.