Outrage After Catholic University Accidentally Hires Practicing Catholic To Head Department Of Theology

May 8, 2017 by  
Filed under Libs & Trads

Image:-Walleigh   A Catholic university is under fire this week after school administrators accidentally hired 37-year-old Todd Alguire, a practicing Catholic, to head their Department of Theology. Diocesan bishop Kevin Sterling  has now demanded an investigation into the ‘offensive’ hiring after rumors spread that students would need to “brush up on the fundamentals of the Catholic  faith” before beginning this upcoming semester. Ryan Gurley,... Read More

Mitch Pacwa Expelled From Society Of Jesus After Being Caught With Catechism

May 1, 2017 by  
Filed under Libs & Trads

  Popular television personality and speaker Fr. Mitch Pacwa has been expelled from the Society of Jesus after being caught in possession of a copy of the Catechism of the Catholic Church earlier this week, Jesuit officials are reporting. According to Jesuit Superior General Arturo Sosa, Pacwa was seen in possession of the Catechism while travelling with fellow Jesuits. Fr. Gerard Nunez immediately reported the “disturbing incident”... Read More

Dejected Stars Ryan Gosling And Emma Stone To Teach Liturgical Dance At Next Year’s LA LA Religious Education Conference

February 28, 2017 by  
Filed under Libs & Trads

After a humiliating loss for Best Picture at this year’s Academy Awards, desperate La La Land stars Ryan Gosling and Emma Stone have signed a one-weekend deal to teach liturgical dance at next year’s Religious Education Conference. “Our theme next year will be ‘Embrace The Body Motion,’” Conference executive Bill Thompson said this morning. “All our dance lessons and events will focus on how we express our love for Christ by... Read More

Woman Shocked To Learn Her Daughter Eloping In Vegas After Doing Nothing to Catechize Her

February 22, 2017 by  
Filed under Libs & Trads

Image: Antoine Tavenaeux Local Catholic Marissa Vaughan was saddened to learn this afternoon that her daughter had decided to elope in Las Vegas after years of not doing jack to catechize her. In what came as a “complete and utter shock,” a tearful Vaughan told EOTT this morning that the decision was very much disappointing, especially considering how much money she and her husband spent on “Catholic school.” “I’m not... Read More

Knights Of Columbus Amassing Troops In Preparation For Vatican Takeover Of Malta

January 26, 2017 by  
Filed under Libs & Trads

Tensions have escalated between conservative and liberal Catholics today as Knights of Columbus members amassed on Malta’s border, which was recently annexed by the Vatican. Maltese U.N. Ambassador Marcallino Galea told EOTT this morning that the Knights of Columbus had amassed more than 40,000 knights on the border of Malta. “These numbers may reflect some very bad intentions and this is the last thing we would like to happen,”... Read More

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