San Diego Bishop To Have Diocese Sprayed In Effort To Fight The Spread Of Orthodoxy

September 8, 2016 by  
Filed under Libs & Trads

In an effort to combat what is being called a “fast-moving and highly contagious disease,” officials at the Diocese of San Diego announced today that they will begin spraying for orthodoxy this month. Diocesan spiritual health officials will spray parts of San Diego after several individuals tested positive for orthodoxy last month. One San Diego resident recently returned from a one week retreat at a Benedictine monastery where orthodoxy is known... Read More

No One At Mass Sure Whether They At Catholic Or Protestant Service

September 7, 2016 by  
Filed under Libs & Trads

Despite efforts to figure whether they were in a Catholic or Protestant service, local parishioners were left baffled after an “animated” man wearing vestments put on a head mic and began pacing back and forth as he delivered his sermon. “The man looked like a priest and I was quite certain I was in a Catholic Church,” said longtime parishioner Joyce Parlin who had no clue as to what the hell was going on. “But he kept pacing back and forth,... Read More

Newspaper Fires Staff Writers Amid Allegations That They Had Opinions 

August 23, 2016 by  
Filed under Libs & Trads

Image: Andrew Hermiz

Image: Andrew Hermiz Two National Catholic Register staff writers have been fired and are now facing possible public flogging after they allegedly had opinions and were outspoken about them. The National Catholic Register on Monday terminated Mark Shea and Simcha Fisher from their positions as staff writers from the EWTN-owned newspaper. Reports from several bloggers say that they were fired for allegedly saying stuff that kinda pissed some Catholics... Read More

Catholics Attending Sedevacantist World Youth Day Still Waiting For Pope To Arrive

August 18, 2016 by  
Filed under Libs & Trads

Image: Socrates2008

Image: Socrates2008 Close to a month after World Youth Day in Poland concluded, many Catholics attending the Sedevacantist World Youth Day are reportedly still anxiously waiting the Pope’s arrival, sources are reporting. According to numerous sources who have been patiently waiting in Krakow since early dawn of 1958 for the Pope’s arrival, the patience of many of the attendees has been “pushed to it’s limits.” “I’ve... Read More

Local Man Demands Pope Create Commission To Study Role Of Insufferable Catholics In The Church

August 3, 2016 by  
Filed under Libs & Trads

  Local man Tim Sutherland announced this morning that he was demanding that Pope Francis create a commission to study the historical role of insufferable Catholics in the Church. The demand for the commission was promised by a frustrated Sutherland one day after the Pope met with a group of nuns on May 12, where Francis announced that the Vatican should study the question of ordaining women as deacons. A fed up Sutherland promptly requested that... Read More

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