Nation’s Catholics Demand Better Catechesis To Better Understand What Teachings To Ignore

Washington, DC––Thousands of the nation’s ill-catechized Catholics protested outside the USCCB headquarters in Washington, DC last night, demanding better catechesis so as to better understand what Church teachings they are going to continue to ignore. 24-year-old Tanya Wilkins who spearheaded the protest told reporters that she feels the need for better catechesis because she had for years “unconsciously ignored teachings such as contraception and co-habitation without ever really knowing that the Church was even against such practices.” She went on to tell reporters that ever since she finished reading The Compendium of the Compendium of the Catechism of the Catholic Church that she felt she was being called to help enlighten the minds of others who were “unconsciously” denying the teachings of the Church. “Now when I tell people that I only attend Mass on Christmas and Easter, I know it’s because I just don’t care, and not just out of sheer ignorance of ‘my’ faith.”

11 thoughts on “Nation’s Catholics Demand Better Catechesis To Better Understand What Teachings To Ignore

  1. Ignorance is no excuse to break the law. I’m glad people like her are starting to get it. May she receive many blessings and graces as she continues her journey. *insert sarcastic font*

  2. Just the periodic note here, as it has to be raised nearly every entry: This is a satire blog; the words contained herein are hilarious works of fiction, not real-life news articles.

  3. You definitely should care about attending mass Tanya as it is a commandment from God. You are waking up the fact that the church was hijacked in the 1960′s by radical bishops who wished to destroy the church and replace it with a worldly body that caters more to the whims of people than to obedience to our Lord. Rise up girl and continue to fight the smoke of satan that entered the church at Vatican II.

  4. I think you may have to add a subtitle to your blog. There just aren’t enough facetious personalities out there. Why so serious?

    This is my new favorite blog. Hilariously hilarious. Hilarious because it is spot on! I vote Eye of the Tiber for the funniest new blog!

  5. Well, the fact that so many people consider these reports true says something about the reality of the situations that are being satirized here. Good satire is always based on reality, and this is an awesome satirical site.

    • No, certainly – that’s true, Roberto. It is a sad fact that you’re correct. However, it is also saddening (not to the same extent, of course) to see brilliant satire immediately deflated by persons who misunderstand that it is satire. The point is immediately blunted.