Chuck-50012 Still Desperately Awaiting Response From Kristin-51053 On Catholic Match

April 2, 2013 by  
Filed under Parish Life, Uncategorized


San Luis Obispo, CA––After drawing international fame last November for his heartfelt message to fellow Catholic Match member Kristin-51053, Chuck-50012 has expressed disappointment to friends and family after not receiving a response for over four months now. The 31-year-old California based web developer told Eye of the Tiber that since writing Kristin-51053 he has spent endless hours saying novenas to St. Raphael. “I must’ve said hundreds of novenas by now, and still ‘K’ hasn’t written me back,” Chuck-50012 said, despondently. “I just don’t get it, you know? I mean, after she didn’t write me the first week, I thought she was just playing hard to get. Then, after the first month, I honestly began to get worried. I thought something may’ve happened to her. I mean, what reason would she have not to write me back, you know? We have so much in common…both being Catholic and all.” Friends of Chuck-50012 told Eye of the Tiber that after not receiving a response for a few months that he abandoned prayers to St. Raphael (Patron Saint of Singles) and began praying, desperately to St. Jude (Patron Saint of Lost Causes.) “Yeah, he was pretty down and out for a while,” long time friend Chris Ashworth said. “He seems to be getting better now, though. Good thing too. It was beginning to get kinda weird there for a while…you know, being as how he was obsessed with a girl he had never met before. It is over, right?” Chuck-50012 says that he’s been working on a new profile to catch his “damsel’s” attention, which he plans to unveil next week. “I’m really excited about next Monday. I have a new profile, new picture. I gotta say I’m super psyched about the new profile pic…I got the whole well-dressed, yet humble, pious, and discerning Italian American Catholic, leaning-carelessly-against-a-wall kinda thing going on in my new picture. Should be a hit.”

Chuck-50012 has graciously provided Eye of the Tiber with a sneak peak to his updated profile.
My Introduction: I was born and raysed in San Luis Obispo. For those of you who don’t speak mexican, the the name of the town is translated into english as saint luis obispo, after the saint. Love it here. love my church “corpus Cristi” which again is translated from the mexican meaning “the corpus of christi.”
My Ideal Match: Kristin-50153

My Faith: 

Means so much to me that ive spent the past five years on cathlic match trying to find a good catholic woman to marry and one day God willing bare my children. I love adoration and I love, quite possibly, one ms. (sooner or later “mrs.?”) somebody from denver, ehim (cough) Kristin 51053??? ; )

My Favorite Saints: Not St. Rapheal. Maybe St. Jude. We’ll see.

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