People Preparing McCarrick Report Same People As Counting Votes In Nevada

After days of ballot counting in Nevada, officials from the state revealed earlier this morning that they were, in fact, the same people that were... Read More

Mass

Liturgical Dancer Tests Positive For Performance-Enhancing Drugs

It is being reported this morning that world-renowned liturgical dancer Doris Griffin has tested positive for performance-enhancing drugs. A USCCB spokesman said that trace amounts of an illegal substance were found in Griffin’s blood... Read More

Area Catholic Preparing To Be Notified About Dirt On Forehead All Day Long

Watertown, MN––While receiving ashes on his forehead at St. Ignatius Catholic Church in Watertown, Minnesota early this morning, area Catholic Trevor Davis fervently prayed for patience to endure what he expected to be a “long day... Read More

There Was Certainly A Point During My Clown Mass When I Thought, “What The Hell Am I Doing?”

Pastor of St. Genesius Catholic Church Fr. Edmond Harrington confirmed this afternoon that at one point during his first ever Clown Mass, he looked down at his oversized checkered shoes as he was praying and thought to himself, “Edmond,... Read More

“Extraordinary Mass Should Not Be The Norm,” Extraordinary Minister Of Holy Communion Reporting

Pigeon Forge, Tennessee––Extraordinary Minister of Holy Communion Ernest Robbins is reporting to friends and family that the Extraordinary Form of the Liturgy “should never become the norm,” but that it should “remain... Read More

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Libs & Trads

Updated SSPX Catechesis Program To Now Include Fundamentals Of Catholic Trolling

Image: WikiCommons SSPX leadership is preparing to launch a new Catechism program in an effort to help better explain Church teaching and how to best completely... Read More

Protestants Worldwide Venerate Statue Of Martin Luther In Honor Of Reformation Day

Image_Jorge Royan   Protestants from across the globe flocked to Wittenberg, Germany Tuesday to venerate a statue of Martin Luther in honor of the 500th anniversary... Read More

Mystery Priest At Car Accident Revealed, Heralded As Courageous Man Who Wore Clerics In Public

The “Missouri Miracle” mystery priest who ministered to Katie Lentz following a head-on crash with another vehicle came forward yesterday morning and... Read More

Cardinal Kasper Says Bible Spreads ‘Confusion’ And ‘Division’

Just days after Cardinal Müller published a “Manifesto of Faith,” which reiterated fundamental Catholic teachings in response to what he sees as growing... Read More

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Politics

Duck Dynasty Star Removed From Congregation For Bishops Just Days After Burke

VATICAN–Just days after Pope Francis removed former La Crosse bishop... Read More

Peace Breaks Out In Israel Moments After Magic Olive Tree Planted

VATICAN–Just moments after Israeli President Shimon Peres and his... Read More

Russian Orthodox Church Accused Of Doping Parishioners To Gain Spiritual Advantage

With Armageddon just around the corner, the Russian Orthodox Church is... Read More

CNN Forced To Neglect Coverage Of March For Life Due To Breaking Footage Of Dolphin Stranded In NYC Canal

  Atlanta, GA––CNN PR director Richard Seymour apologized to... Read More

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Vatican

Benedict Confirms Epic Kegger At Apostolic Palace During Francis Visit To U.S.

VATICAN– Pope Emeritus Benedict XVI confirmed Monday that he will make his... Read More

Pope Francis Gets Last F-Bomb Out Of System before Giving Up Cussing For Lent

VATICAN–His Holiness Pope Francis shocked the world today during a Papal Audience... Read More

New DC Comics ‘Benedict V Francis: Dawn Of Mercy’ Film Getting Terrible Reviews

Image: Andrew Hermiz It’s been three years since Benedict’s colossal battle... Read More

Vatican Approves Construction of World’s Largest Bus To Throw Chinese Catholics Under

  The Vatican said this past weekend that it had reached an agreement with... Read More

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